20 Mar
This morning’s Facebook status:
I was awakened by Alphonse’s sobbing this morning. Bad dreams, I think. I often wonder what he thinks of, dreams of, and these are things that will forever remain a mystery unless I can open the world of communication to him. After I wiped away his tears, whispered “Mama is here” repeatedly, and kissed him over and over again, he quieted down and went back to bed. The cat helped a little, heehee.


 What goes on inside your head

When you sleep and dream

Of things unsaid?

What goes on inside your mind

When you close your eyes

And leave wakefulness behind?


I often wonder, my son,

How to reach you

When I feel you are half gone

Stuck between my world and yours

There’s a wall I cannot break, a place I cannot breach

And Autism has locked the doors.


But as you lay fast asleep

I whisper my wishes for you

And let my fervent prayers run deep

That in the darkness of sleep

You know Mama is always there with you

My love for you to keep.


6 Responses to “Dreams”

  1. Just A Friend March 20, 2012 at 4:02 pm #

    Very touching, kittymama. 🙂

    • Kittymama April 11, 2012 at 11:12 am #

      Thank you.

  2. adicayaban March 20, 2012 at 5:14 pm #

    You know Pinky, when my son sleeps, I watch him a lot. Just like what you do with Alphonse. I hope that when he wakes up, everything will be alright. But day in and day out, he wakes up and you know things are the same. Sometimes he looks at me like he doesn’t even know me. And that’s when the heart breaks.

    • Kittymama April 11, 2012 at 11:11 am #

      I know the heartbreak. I often feel the same way. But I also know that when he is asleep, he knows who I am and needs me to be there. The heartbreak doesn’t seem all that bad after then.

  3. kitz March 27, 2012 at 5:46 pm #

    Awww… I do the same thing with my little one whenever he’s crying asleep. I’ll kiss him while saying, “Mommy’s here” and he’ll go back to sleep, smiling.

    • Kittymama April 11, 2012 at 11:07 am #

      They do know it’s us, and knowing that our presence helps them sleep better is one of a best gifts ever for a mother. 🙂

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