Birthday Bonanza

This

was supposed to be my birthday cake. All 12 by 8 inches of soft, moist butter cake topped with a 10-inch fondant and royal icing Hello Kitty Chinese Empress in red. This was a surprise birthday cake A had especially made for me.

 

 

And this

was all that was left of Hello Kitty, ten minutes after she arrived in the house.

Alphonse, in his excitement, thought she was a doll, and before anyone could stop him, grabbed the Kitty topper and hugged her tight.  I’m ashamed to admit it now, but at that moment when he lunged for the cake, I cried. I hadn’t even taken a picture of it yet, I hadn’t even blown out the birthday candles, and here it was, destroyed in seconds.

Alphonse smiled innocently at us, a little confused about my reaction, as tears fell down my face. He licked the sticky red icing off his hands, wiped the rest on his head, chewed on the fondant pieces that fell off,  and walked around waving a crushed Kitty which looked more like zombie kitty than anything else.

Yes, I cried, and A comforted me. I saw the sense in his calmness and reasoning much later, after I had spent all my tears. A reminded me that nothing bad had happened, that it was only cake, and that it would still taste delicious even after a little manhandling. We were all together, that was what mattered.  As usual, my A was right.

From that low point on the eve of my birthday, things got better and just took off. This is the first birthday celebration I have spent at home in the last couple of years. With rising concern about the A(H1N1) virus (we like to call it the ahini virus, heehee) and Alphonse just past a real dengue scare, we were loathe to leave the kids. We had planned a weekend with them at home, but with provisions for some alone time for the two of us. I prepped for my birthday lunch with the family the day before, cooking the spaghetti sauce ahead of time and marinading the chicken overnight in homemade barbecue sauce. The nannies helped out in the morning by grilling the chicken and cooking the pasta. It all worked out perfectly, tasted yummy too.

This is the second cake A gave me. Alphonse blew out the candles on this one and said “mama” at the end of the birthday song. I was able to record it on video and this is probably one of the best things that happened that day. It is simply amazing to hear him call my name! I get goosebumps each time he does it. Ah, I hope I never get used to it…

 As usual, A and the kids loaded me with gifts that amazed, astounded, and touched me no end. A got me a complete set of pink clubs and the pinkest golf bag in the whole world! I don’t mind at all that it’s not Hello Kitty, as long as it’s pink!

I also received new Mizuno ladies’ golf shoes and pink gloves. Later, A got me two new pairs of golf slacks and long-sleeved shirts (alas! they were not pink) which I forgot to photograph in the excitement of the day.

The kids gave me the HK bag (perfect for the rainy season because it is water repellant) and A just piled me with books of all sorts, more HK MAC merch, and a new HK lunchbox! Even Kitty got a birthday surprise when A gave her a new doll suitcase to hold her Build-A-Bear clothing.

It isn’t always easy to be grateful and thankful for everything in our lives. The cake episode reminded me that. But if there’s anything I learned with the passing of the years, it is that love eases all the difficulties in our lives. I am blessed that I have A to thank for that.

How Does Your Garden Grow?

In SM North EDSA’s case, very well, thank you.

In this season of unexpected and erratic weather, it was surprising and, yes, refreshing to find an oasis of calm within this bustling city. In the last few years.  high rises and massive malls have dominated the landscape of Metro Manila’s largest city such that it had become difficult to find even just a sliver of free space. 

We were pleasantly surprised, however, when we visited SM North EDSA, our favorite mall, and witnessed how its recent transformation (part of a PhP2B renovation plan) has made malling more than simply a shopping experience. In the space between the new Annex and the second floor of the main department store building hangs an elevated park aptly called The Sky Garden. Opened to the public last May 25, it was formally inaugurated on May 29 by SM Prime Holdings President Hans Sy.

The weather was perfect that night. It had not rained heavily in a while and the cool evening breeze was rejuvenating. A leisurely stroll along the 400-meter canopied walkway that spanned the length of the garden revealed a beautifully landscaped space that boasts of vibrant greens (55 species of plants, we were told) and elegant water features (my favorites are the Japanese rock garden and the cascade waterfall which uses recycled water, yay!).

A and I were thrilled. We are regulars of SMNE, and were we count to times we visit the mall in a month, we would have to use more than our hands to register the actual number. That we now have another green space so near our home (and much nearer than the QC Park) adds to the attraction this place holds for us. He and I have are already making plans to run a race one bright morning, just to see if we can break Michael Johnson’s 400-m record. :-)

We have yet to bring Alphonse to visit, but one weekend this month, we definitely will. He will love the water features, we are sure of it, but we are most sure that he will love most the fact that we don’t have to drive all the way to Katipunan to get his Ineng’s Special BBQ fix. After all, when it comes to Alphonse, garden + water + BBQ = pure joy!

  

 (From left, SM’s VP for North Area Mr. Bien Mateo, A, me, SM’s VP for Marketing Communications Ms. Milagros Dizon, some special friends and BW’s Advertising Director Danny Ocampo)

Concert Queen

I was cleaning up files this morning, organizing them in folders, deleting some, transferring the more important ones to my laptop, and saving the rest in CDs. The PC has been boggy of late; sometimes, it slows down considerably while making scary groaning and screeching sounds. Fearing that my files may be swallowed in the black hole of oblivion, I thought it best time to retrieve them before the inevitable crash comes.

I realized, while moving my digital album files, that I’ve accumulated a lot of concert pictures. I haven’t been as conscientious in keeping this online journal updated with the events of my life, thus, the backlog in this weblog (heehee- sorry!). As such, I’ve chosen a few of the more memorable concerts I’ve been to in the last few months and selected some of the nicer pictures to put up and share with you.

In February, I attended two concerts one week apart: “Missing You,” featuring Martin Nievera and Pops Fernandez, the local concert scene’s royal couple, in a dramatic musical reunion- 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and “Peter Cetera Live in Manila,” featuring the former lead of the popular band Chicago and the voice behind some of the eighties’ most enduring love songs.

Peter Cetera wowed us with solid vocals that have not changed the least bit through the years. Who would believe that this man is past sixty? And who would believe that this man learned to sing through a wired jaw? He is absolutely fantastic even today!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In March, Ms. Natalie Cole paid a visit to Manila. Her voice was sultry and warm, her pitch was flawless, and her poise perfect. She was also adamantly opposed to any unauthorized video recording of her performance and had to berate a few members of the audience for continuing to record, even after her early reminders not to do so. 

 

   

 

Later that month, John Legend filled the Araneta Coliseum to the rafters, one of the few foreign acts that did so in the early dismal months of 2009. 

 

 

Just two weeks ago, American Idol’s sensations David Archuleta and David Cook performed in a sold-out concert at the SM Mall of Asia. We had VIP tickets, but we learned to our dismay that VIP in this case meant squat. There were simply too many people crammed in a really flat venue. It was hot and humid, unaccustomed as we were (or as I was) to the hot salty sea air that blew only sporadically. I took as many shots as I could but I ended up getting more pictures of people’s heads or behinds as they jumped or climbed on plastic seats to get a better view. Even Kitty, who sported a specially-made I♥David Archuleta pin, was dead tired before concert’s end.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By the way, you won’t see any David Cook pictures because I, ehrm, rather, Kitty is a diehard Archie girl. 

I’ve been to quite a lot of concerts and live shows in the past years that my friends call me as the Concert (goer) Queen. I am truly lucky that the opportunities to do so have always come my way. Yes, I am always thankful and mindful that such blessings may not come so soon in the near future. Still, I think that there is such a thing as concert fatigue, and this is probably more as a function of age than anything else. When you start yawning when everyone else around you is still dancing and carousing, or when your legs turn numb after a couple of hours on plastic chairs, it’s time to reevaluate if your honorary title needs to be bequeathed to a more deserving person. Then again, maybe I just need to prep myself more for big nights…

I think the Pussycat Dolls are coming in June. Shall we? We’ll see…

Tough Summer

It’s getting easier and easier to pass by the computer without being seized by the urge to sit down in front of it and surf the net or blog. What started out as a Lenten exercise of self-restraint and sacrifice has become a real reflection of my constant lack of time here at home. Between my son Alphonse (with his escalating needs) and the housework, the only time I can find some respite is when he lies down at night to sleep. But I’m not giving up yet. It isn’t over till the fat lady sings. In this case, I am the fat lady, and I am definitely not singing “Adieu” just yet.

This has been one tough summer, and I don’t think it’s over yet. Contrary to common expectation, summers in our household are usually periods of stress and sieges. Summers are when nannies leave, either permanently or for brief vacations. Summers are when I have an extra child in the house, which necessarily translates to time divided and an increase in demand for food. (Most days, I feel like a short order cook.) While Big Brother Alex can be a lot of help, particularly with babysitting, somehow, his presence in the home makes Alphonse refuse to work or study. I think Alphonse has learned to associate his brother’s presence with weekends and free time. As a result, he resists our schedules, and what used to be seamless transitions for his activities have become constant battles for control.

Then, too, to make things just a little more complicated, with the departure of his regular nanny for a vacation, we welcomed his old nanny back into our home – with two sons in tow. While we felt that this would not be the wisest choice to make, given than Alphonse hates sudden changes, we could not ignore her pleas for help. The children were starving in their hometown, and their mother, once Alphonse’s beloved nanny of four years, begged for help, even if only temporarily. The sudden introduction of children crying loudly late into the night, of little boys poaching on Alphonse’s turf and playing with his toys, and of the rambunctious pitter patter of little feet (in early morning!) have disturbed our home’s equilibrium. The first few weeks after they arrived, I had a headache almost every day, so unused were we with having to share space with little children again. Alphonse’s sleep cycles were disturbed by the new sounds in our home, and this has made him more irritable and more prone to fits of anger. We cover our hair with bandannas all day to prevent the recurrence of hair pulling, and wear loose shirts after Alphonse ripped my good nightgowns in anger. These have been difficult days, we all know.

Yet for all the difficulties we encounter, I still see goodness in these trying days. Despite the children’s wariness to their new surroundings and circumstances, they both adore Alphonse. They imitate what he does, from jumping on the trampoline, to chewing on ice (one of Alphonse’s quirks), to playing with bubbles. The older child, a five-year-old boy, declared that he will jump every day so he will grow to be as beautiful as Alphonse. The two-year-old, a very tiny squirt of a child and still more of an infant than a toddler, already acts like a big brother to Alphonse, calling out to him kindly and constantly, “Kuya Alphonse, bubbles kita?” (Big Brother Alphonse, shall I blow bubbles for you?”) In the last week, Alphonse has passed them by without so much as a glance as the kids shouted in unison, “Hi, Kuya Alphonse!” Today, he actually looked at them for a while before moving on.

This is all temporary, I know. In a few months, we will have to reevaluate our domestic set-up and try to find other ways to help Alphonse and these children. Right now, our household budget is strained to the limit, and I feel the stress of having to be more creative and more resourceful in order to make everything work for this larger household. And so, between the added responsibilities these changes have brought upon us and the balancing acts as peacemaker and negotiator I perform for all the members of my family, I find little time to speak my mind in the pages of my own blog or in this forum. Today is a rarity, one that has allowed me time to breathe and recharge before I take up my role as mother to all again. But I yet hold hope that this tough summer will pass. I just have to remember to take it slowly, one day at a time.

 From Herword.com, May 14, 2009

Autism And The Movies

Every afternoon, at around one, Alphonse knocks on the back door and asks to be let in the house. He knocks politely and says “he” rather loudly (”he” is his word for help). When the door is opened, he runs to the upstairs bedroom and hands me a picture card of our television. Then he gets the DVD remote control and fiddles with the buttons before he hands it over to me. This is his way of saying “Please, I want to watch a movie.”

Alphonse has always loved movies, and were it up to him, he would watch the same movie over and over again without ever tiring of it. These days, however, we keep his movies in rotation – one picture a day, we tell him, so he does not fixate on one particular film for long (unlike the time when we didn’t know better and let him watch “The Lion King” daily for a whole year!).

This is a change to his routine, and we are all pleasantly surprised. In colder months, he would spend his class breaks outdoors with more physical activities or just brief naps in his old sofa in the backyard. These days, however, perhaps because of the oppressive midday heat, he is forced to retreat into the shade for a time, and what better way to enjoy this time than with a movie?

His choices in movies are rather predictable, even after all these years. He still loves cartoon musicals best, but non-musicals, whether cartoons or not, are boring to him. We’ve tried to expand his repertoire of favorites by introducing new animated features and more age-appropriate movies, without success. Often, he would just simply leave the room and never come back. Sometimes, though, he would surprise us suddenly, like the time he watched “The Transformers” with us. I think we ended up watching him more than the movie as he hardly ever took his eyes off the television screen. For a moment there, we felt like a completely normal family with teenagers.

This love for movies, however, has never been translated into the outside world. Alphonse has never watched a movie in a real cinema. Once, when he was a lot younger, we tried to bring him to a screening of Mulan, a full-length Disney movie we thought he’d like, but the darkened theater and the deafening sounds were simply too much for his senses, and they completely unnerved him. As soon as the lights were turned down low and the trailers started, he shrieked and cried so loudly that we hurriedly ran for the nearest exit to prevent a full-scale meltdown. He was almost four then. We’ve never tried it again since then.

One can see, even at home, that the same things that bothered him when he was four still bother him today. When we attempt to turn down the lights in the bedroom to evoke a more cinematic ambience, he rushes to the light switches and turns on all the lights in one go. When the sounds are turned up a little too loudly, he is the first to leave the room. Some things change, true, but others remain the same. Movie-watching, apparently, is one of them.

The television is often a source of comfort for many individuals with autism. Not only is it accessible and readily available, but given the individual with autism’s often rigid schedules, this frequently provides the repetitive stimuli they crave for. Movies in cinemas, however, are another matter altogether. Movie theaters are often inaccessible to individuals with autism because these provide too much sensory input (via sound and light) that can overwhelm the person’s senses.

Moreover, because movie-going is almost always a social experience, individuals with autism find it hard to work within the rules of social movie watching. Noises are normally discouraged in theaters, as are frequently standing up, moving around, and making unnecessary body movements. As such, individuals with autism often feel unwelcome in this environment and would avoid it altogether.

Like so many other families with autism in their lives, we’ve long given up on the idea of watching a movie as a family. We’ve learned to sublimate this desire, even if once in a while, you still can hear Big Brother Alex sigh whimsically and say “I wish Alphonse were here with us” on the occasions we bring him to the movies. And yet, unknown to us, this dream is slowly taking shape in other people’s lives, in another part of the world.

I was amazed to learn that autism-friendly screenings in cinemas have been initiated in the United Kingdom, and this is giving me food for thought. Picturehouse Cinemas, a large chain of movie houses in England, has dedicated autism-friendly screenings since January 25 of this year. During these scheduled events, low lights are left on inside the theater, and the volume of the soundtrack is reduced to diminish anxiety and sensory problems. No one makes a fuss when moviegoers move around or make noise; these are all perfectly acceptable. The screenings happen only once a month (schedules are announced beforehand), but for many parents, this is a godsend.

I was thinking, how many Filipino parents with children with autism feel relieved that this is even a possibility? If parents of individuals with autism, aided by our own Autism Society, can petition for even a single autism-friendly run of a movie, I know for sure that my entire family would be first in line. I haven’t the vaguest idea how this will go. Knowing my son, I am sure there’ll be a couple of snorts, some flapping, a lot of screeching, and even generous fits of body hopping, but I would love for him (and for all of us) to have this experience. And if it doesn’t work out, maybe, we could try again another time.

With this thought in mind, I am preparing letters for Autism Society Philippines and for major cinema chains in my city. I am crossing my fingers. I am positively hopeful. Maybe we can even show the world that when it comes to compassion, there is no short supply in this part of the world.

(Column for Herword.com, April 7, 2009)

World Autism Awareness Day

April 2 is World Autism Awareness Day and it could not have come soon enough.

In the last year alone, we have read and heard of cases of individuals with autism that have suffered injustices in the hands of a supposedly tolerant and accepting society. Cases such as the child “voted” out of kindergarten classroom, Survivor-style, referring, of course, to the popular reality television series that eliminates its constestants via popular vote; the child kicked off an airplane (and this is no longer an isolated case); the teenager who was turned away by his own church; the eight-year-old girl arrested at school for unruly behavior ; even the 12-year old boy who was tasered by the police. In the last few months alone, two teenage males with severe autism have been arrested for alleged murder. The day when our kids are seen as not only disabled BUT as serious threats to society seems closer each day now. This, despite our best efforts to find help and acceptance in this world for our children.

I have gone past the stage of wanting a cure for my own son and moving on to the point where all I want is acceptance and understanding.  If we could find more compassion in our hearts for those of us who have less in life, for those of us we see as ”disabled” or even “damaged,” then we will go a long way into making awareness more than simply what it is. For to be aware is to be cognizant of truth- that while individuals with autism continuously face many challenges, they are no less human than any one of us. And they, too, deserve their place in the sun.

Pictures From A Summer Weekend

When Alex’s class decided to take a weekend trip to Tagaytay on the last day of classes, A and I decided to follow, with Alphonse in tow. That way, while Alex would be with his classmates, Alphonse can also enjoy a weekend out of town.

We knew we wouldn’t be doing much sightseeing since Alphonse hates being dragged about various places. We visited Alex as soon as we arrived, just to check if they were already settled in (they were staying in a classmate’s house, all 39 of them, supervised by our hardworking parent volunteers and the parent officers of the class). Then we drove to our destination for a weekend of lazing about in the quiet comforts of Discovery Country Suites.

Here are pictures from that summer weekend:

Alex with his classmates

This has got to be one of the best hotel rooms we’ve ever stayed in- it’s very child-friendly! Alphonse simply loved it!

The extra bed on the right was a queen-sized bed Alphonse eyed as soon as we arrived. We thought he would sleep in it but he crawled into bed with us in the middle of the night. Oh, well…

He moved to the other bed only around six in the morning. He also skipped breakfast (he kept shaking his head to offers of food) to sleep in. He didn’t really want to leave.

Views from the balcony- Alphonse enjoyed the cooler air

MAC and Me

I could be talking about MAC, the Mysterious Alien Creature from the 1988 cult movie “Mac and Me,” but I’m not. (Well, aren’t you glad?)

What I am talking about is MAC or Make-up Art Cosmetics, a Canadian cosmetics company founded by Frank Toskan and Frank Angelo in 1984 and which was later acquired by Estée Lauder.

I was thinking of all these when I dropped by my favorite MAC store at Rustan’s Shangri-La yesterday evening. This Saturday, March 21, 2009, is the brand’s official launch of its Hello Kitty cosmetics in all MAC branches in the city, and Kitty lovers like me are eagerly awaiting its debut on Philippine soil. Next to its socially relevant programs (my favorite being the Back to MAC Recycling program), I happen to think that its color collaboration with Hello Kitty is one of its best ideas yet. Although not entirely novel as MAC also brought in Mattel in 2007’s Barbie Loves MAC, the idea was greeted with enthusiasm by many who grew up with the mouthless feline creature of cuteness.

Of course, I had called the store earlier in the day to ask about the launch.  I was informed that the event was a whole day affair, but unlike launches in cities abroad, no specific program had yet been laid out. I was also told that I could reserve items in person even before the launch as the products had already reached the counters the night before. I had planned to take a leisurely day yesterday and spend hours playing with Mario Kart Wii but the call changed my day’s plans. Knowing that I would have mere hours to get ready, I cancelled my afternoon Wii game play and set about making myself decent and ready for the store trip early evening.

There were already a few others checking out samples arranged on the make-up counter when I arrived. I looked at product lines, sampled some of the colors, and chose the items I wanted. I was a little ambivalent, though, about the eye palette since I hardly use any eye color except on special occasions. I’m actually more of a lip and cheek girl, the no-fuss type when it comes to everyday make-up.

I took doubles of the items I wanted, one to use and one to save, but A prevailed over me on this one. He said that if I intended to buy extras, then I should use them as well and just keep the containers as souvenirs.  A’s no-nonsense approach set me right again and shook some sense in this Kittyholic. So while I did take doubles, they’re doubles of the colors I want and will use in the future.

I absolutely love the colors I chose; they suited my coloring very well. Unlike my previous foray into HK cosmetics (mostly made by some unknown Japanese cosmetics company), I love that I can trust my skin and face to a reliable brand. (I tend to to drift more to Estée Lauder, Clinique and Shu Uemura for make-up, and Clinique or Shiseido for skincare.) I am absolutely bowled over by the Hello Kitty packaging. Too bad, though, that the MAC Hello Kitty accessories (doll, bracelet, cosmetic bags, brushes) weren’t made available in the country. That would have made the whole experience more complete. Still, I chose to buy my MAC HK items here in the country, if only to prove that our local market is reliable, alive, and booming, even in these uncertain times. Who knows? Maybe if they do see that, they’ll think twice about the accessories and fly them over as well. I’m crossing my fingers.

 I love my MAC!

Five Riddles

Between the last week of classes (for Alex, which coincidentally was also the week of final exams) and an impromptu weekend trip planned just days before the actual date, last week I was neck deep (and sinking fast) in unfinished chores.

Add to that nanny transitions (’tis the time of the year, it seems), an on-again-off-again problem with our home Internet connection, and an irresistable urge to play Superpoke Pets and Farm Town on Facebook (whenever I got connected), and blogging took an unexpected back seat to my other life.  Alex teases me by calling  it ”A Facebook Life.”

See my two new addictions?

Before I fill you in on the things I’ve been up to, here are the answers to my last post. Manggy got a lot of them right (I’ll concede his answer to number three though match heads do come in quite an assortment of colors, not just black); then again, Manggy’s one brainy dude.  

1: The third room. Lions that haven’t eaten in three years are dead.

2: The woman took a photo, developed it, and hung it up to dry.

3: Charcoal (but black-headed matchsticks do burn the same way)

4: Yesterday, today and tomorrow!

5: No e’s

Will be back in a little while, dearest friends, to share some photos of our spur-of-the-moment trip. Let’s hope my Internet connection is more stable then.

Have a great weekend!

Midweek Fun

It’s Wednesday, the middle of the work week, and I am sooo looking forward to the weekend. 

I’ve found out, however, that on a completely overwhelming day such as this, it helps to break the stress and tedium of the day with some quiet time. Sit down, put your feet up, breathe, close your eyes, and meditate. (And if you’re anything like me, the bathroom has got to be the best place for some quiet time!)

For some with a little more energy to spare, perhaps you can spend a few minutes to have some fun with these questions a friend sent me. These are simple, no need to get your underwear (or mine) in a knot over them. And I’m sure everyone will get the answers right.

I’ll post the answers tomorrow.

1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose among three
rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of
assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven’t
eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?

2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over
five minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But five minutes later they both go out
and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?

3. What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and gray when
you throw it away ?

4. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words
Wednesday, Friday, or Sunday?

5. This is an unusual paragraph.  I’m curious as to just how quickly
you can find out what is so unusual about it.  It looks so ordinary and
plain that you would think nothing was wrong with it.  In fact, nothing
is wrong with it! It is highly unusual though.  Study it and think
about it, but you still may not find anything odd.  But if you work at
it a bit, you might find out. Try to do so without any coaching!

Happy Thinking!