Gratitude

“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” — Albert Schweitzer

I was watching an old episode of Oprah today, the one where the Smith family (Will Smith’s) was promoting The Karate Kid remake. Something Will said struck me as important, “Greatnes lies at the brink of destruction,” and somehow I understood what it is he meant. I’ve been trying to draw something positive from our family’s recent experiences and that seemed to me to be most appropriate. We have faced our worst fears and have come out of this scathed and scarred, but alive; we are still standing.

I have to make a conscious effort to change my mindset these days. I have been struggling with my feelings since this all began, trying to remain optimistic and constructive, but often with less than successful results.

Today, however, I will choose to live in a space of thankfulness. Today, I will fight to shed the cloak of fear that envelopes my being. Today, I resolve to start living again.  

Working on this, I start by sharing this wonderful picture of my son Alex. This just about makes my heart burst with pride and happiness.

Doesn’t he look adorable? (Okay. Give this Momma some love and you all agree with me on this one.)

Alex will graduate from high school this coming Sunday afternoon. We are very happy parents to see him through this important milestone. A couple more months and he is off to college. Time is passing swiftly, indeed.

And because I choose today to be a happy day, allow me to use this time to pause and reflect on the blessings we have received throughout our family’s ordeal. The truth is, we are a family unused to kindness from others. Perhaps because we have had little of it in the time since Alphonse’s diagnosis that unexpected gestures of kindness floor us. As friends and family moved away or removed us from their lives- some by happenstance, many by choice- we learned to sublimate the pain that comes with rejection and instead, replace this grief with self-reliance and independence. We learned to harden our resolve and simply do what needs to be done, with as little bother to anyone as possible.  

As such, this surprising outpouring of love and support has overwhelmed us completely. That these are done without expectations of reciprocity amaze us; that many are people who are not related to us in any way astounds us even more. I think if there is any doubt that God exists at all, it is easily dispelled by the kindness of the human heart. Only Someone divine and infallible can create Love.

To Patricia– for all our messages of advice and support and for your genuine friendship,

To Lyra– for your open heart and your generous spirit, for the smiles and happy tears your kindness has sprinkled our lives with,

To Dang and Tiff–  for your visit which proved to be a balm to my soul,  

To Pilar– for your thoughtful gesture and your reassurance of kinship ,

To Chat, Rams, Aileen, Lissa, Ronnie, Melyn, Mei, Ron, and Auden – for your messages of support and friendship, for your constant prayers, for your presence in our lives,

To my blog, SF forum, and FB friends- Leirs, Lori, Sarah, Pei, Tanja, Eric, Candy– for thinking of us often with kindness and concern,

To Teacher Rod and Teachers Paolo, Wilson, Mark and Jom– for coming to our aid in our time of need, for working with Alphonse patiently day in and day out amidst his troubles,

To my 4B family- Ms.Joy Sacluti (Alex’s adviser), Malu, Carina, Sally,  Joville, Cecille – and all of Alex’s teachers at the Ateneo– for helping Alex cope especially in the last few months of school (Alex could not have made it through these difficult months without your love and patience), for your prayers and words of encouragement,

To Mommy. Daddy, and Jas– for the home cooked meals, for the free babysitting whenever we needed respite, for simply always being there,

Thank you for standing with us in these difficult times. There is a long way to go yet but your kindness and love have helped us immensely in this journey of healing. God bless you all.